Side effects

Our 10-yr-old son’s friend has been with us since yesterday. After today’s full play date, today at least they listened to me and started to study.

I am just going upstairs with some drinks to their floor when I hear the conversation behind the door:

They: ‘Ok, so we have a list of words, let’s see: ‘orgasm’ – what can it be??’

At this point I am very silently turning around tiptoeing downstairs, when the door opens:

My son: ‘Mama, where are you going? Aren’t those drinks for us? Listen, we need your help. What is ‘orgasm’?’

Me: ‘First of all let’s see what the task exactly is, before we would jump on the explanation..’

They: ‘We need to write each word to 1 of the coloumns ‘men’, ‘women’, ‘both’. Is it for both, with each other?’

Me: ‘Yes. I mean no! It can be for 2 men or 2 women as well… or 1… or… But hey, let’s not get stuck at the 1st word, let’s move on to the next one, I say..’

They: ‘Yes, ok, good idea! The 2nd one is ‘e-ja-cu-lation’..’

Giving to 10-yr-old children the sexual education school material – then the next day locking down schools closing children up with their home-office parents for weeks … very funny, dear teachers… very funny..

About Our Newest Mass Social Experiment

Corona – apart from being a ‘medical situation’ – is a nice big social experiment at the same time.

Yesterday my husband went to do the groceries (regular shopping, no extra amount or frequency), among them toilet paper.

Returning home I asked him what he experienced in Delhaize.

He: ‘Some food products are sold out, there I bought something comparable.

Toilet paper is indeed almost completely off. I took the last but one package.’

Btw, I don’t find it a pure coincidence that I had married a guy who finishes the sentence with ‘the last but one package’ instead of ‘the 2 last packages’.

Peace..

Home schooling

Due to Corona virus, the next 3 weeks schools are closed in Belgium, and children are studying from home. They might here and there need some help from the parents – which, in a highly educated family like ours can of course not be a problem.
My son (10) is currently preparing his biology homework: they learn about the female genitals.
He: ‘Mama, I need to fill in this picture with the names of the female genitals, but it’s so difficult..’
Me: ‘No panic, Walter, mama keeps everything under control. I will just look up a similar drawing on the internet in Dutch, and so you can just learn from that one… here we go!’ 
He: ‘Mama… this woman has a penis.’
Me: ‘Ooops, one seconds, I’m looking for another one..’
Home schooling – with slight bumps on the road – so what..

Statistics

We are celebrating the birthday of our daughter today. 
Me to my husband: ‘Have you managed to buy a birthday cake so that she can take it to the school for the children?’
My husband: ‘Yes, 3 cakes.’
Me (truly shocked): ‘What? Threeeeee??? Omg, you two shouldn’t be left alone in a shop..’
My husband: ‘I bargained it down from 4.’
Me (truly admiring): ‘What? You managed to bargain down on sweets with our daughter??
You are clearly amazing.
That’s my husband…’

S like ‘ssssobig’

As widely known* (*for those who look now surprised – what were you reading up to now for God’s sake??) some weeks ago I ordered several clothes online.
Conclusion: this jumpsuit (size S) is sooo big that if I didn’t combine it with a belt, it would land in no time around my ankles.

Mental note: remember next time to order a belt..