Just found a school report of my daughter (now 14 ys, back then she was 10). Children need to sign the reports here, too.
Well, her signature was apparently the combination of a comet and a magic wand.
I like people with ambition.
Me to my 11-yr old son: ‘What do you think the major difference is between you growing up here in Belgium – as opposed to if you were living in Hungary?’
Walter: ‘Now I can ask in four languages where the toilet is.’
My most favourite spare time activity is to manually correct the mistakes made by my mobile’s autocorrect function – a function that was designed to enable me spare time while writing.
My husband to our 10-yr-old son:
‘Walter, would you like to come and see how I make pancake? In case in the future you would also end up with a lazy daughter & wife in your family who you would need to cook for.. But don’t forget son, in this family we are still working hard on getting equal rights for boys..’
Walter: ‘Uh you are making pancakes?? Can I also get some? Don’t have time now, still playing on my mobile…’
My husband: ‘…Where was I? Ah yes, at the equal-right-for-papas movement..’
Me: ‘What do you have in your cup, tea?’
My husband (with patience): ‘Yes, it is tea. I am well aware that it might be mistaken for a urine sample, too, still it is camomile tea. ….True, it WILL become a urine sample pretty soon, and…’
Me: ‘Thank you. Honestly, all I wanted to ask you if you want a re-fill from the freshly made tea …but to receive a complete urological dissertation instead is way better than that, isn’t it..’
Ok, let that 2021 start, we are ready.
I am ready to start
– sorry for the English speakers, one post exceptionally in Hungarian.. –
A minap becsönget hozzánk a szomszédasszony, kezében egy sor égőt lóbálva, aminek is köszönhetően az alábbi lélekemelő beszélgetésnek vagyok fültanúja:
Szomszédasszony: “…és tehát arra gondoltam, hogy az ünnepekre tekintettel mi is fénybe boríthatnánk itt az utcát úgy, hogy önök és a szembeszomszéd is keresztülvezeti ezt az égősort a levegőben kb emelet magasságban, nézze csak, pont mint mi..”
Házastársam (marcona kiállás, vallási ünnepek iránt mérsékelten fogékony lelkület):
“Remek ötletnek hangzik – egészen a következő villanyszámláig.”
Szomszédasszony: “Természetesen csak sötétedéskor kapcsoljuk fel! Ezekben a lelkileg nehéz időkben jót tenne mindannyiunk mentálhigiéniájának..”
Házastársam: “…valamint a globális felmelegedésnek..”
Szomszédasszony: “Nade milyen szép is lesz, amikor az embereket munkából hazajöve fényár fogadja..”
Házastársam: “Nekem úgy rémlik, Covid van, kb mindenki itthonról dolgozik.”
Szomszédasszony: “De mégiscsak karácsony meg az ünnepi hangulat..”
Házastársam: “Nem vagyok róla meggyőződve, hogy az ünnepi hangulat jegyében feltétlenül újabb szöget kellene vernünk bolygónk koporsójába.., de ha a szembeszomszéd benne van, én semmi jónak nem leszek elrontója.”
Szomszédasszony: “Tudtam én, hogy ilyen kedves ember maga, megyek is és intézkedem a szomszédnál!”
Így esett, hogy egy nap a szomszédig átívelő égősor került ablakunkba.
A romantika kedvelőinek:
A helyzetet végül a kukásautó oldotta meg, mely csütörtöki szokásos körén nemes egyszerűséggel magával vitte a teljes felszerelést fényárral, mentálhigiéniával..
Azóta házastársam ünnepi hangulata töretlen.
My son (10) received homework for the holidays from school: he needs to investigate what his parents do for a living.
..is better with
…I’ve decided to firmly refrain from any challenges.
Oh wait – where is this piece fitting??
Our xmas tree.
When I saw it strongly tied up in golden/silver lace first I thought poor thing has been kidnapped & kept hostage in our household. But the rest of the family reassured me they spent quality time on decorating it.
OK, considering it’s 2020 – it’s not that bad after all..
Paper and digital drawings of my daughter (14).
Quick conclusion based on the drawing skills which people say are inheritable within the family: no idea who the real parents of our daughter might be..
‘I am back from having switched the summer tyres to winter ones.
I didn’t exactly remember where the garage was, but I realised that during Covid these things are slightly less complicated. So I set in the GPS the address where I went by car last time: in May, switching the winter tyres to summer ones..’
What’s your menu plans for the holidays?
For clarity: I am not looking for recipes but invitations.
My daughter (14 ys) preparing for her exam tomorrow:
‘Mama, I still need to study hard for tomorrow. Could you come here to the sofa and be with me? It’s so motivating.’
Me (deeply touched): ‘Really? Sure I come! Shall I also study with you?’
She: ‘No, it’s enough if you are just close. Whenever I look at you I get scared that I am still not ready..’
How do you know it’s really 2020:
When on a cold winter day during Covid lockdown the postman delivers you your traffic fine that you collected on the family trip in Italy last summer.
My daughter (14) is undergoing a dental surgery.
Her little brother, Walter (10) is asking questions: ‘And what will happen to you?’
She: ‘I am going in – then tomorrow coming out, but with a swollen face.’
He: ‘What does “swollen” mean’? I don’t know this word..’
She: ‘I will look like a Snapchat filter’.
He: ‘Aaaaa, now I understand.’
Today is Friday 13.
Good old Fridays 13 when you wouldn’t want to fly on this day.
When I am starting to energetically fill in the enrolment form for my own table tennis club membership – just to learn I am too old even for ‘senior’..
Soon I will become more and more interesting for collectors and archeologists.
Me to my daughter: ‘Noëmi, is your maths homework ready?’
Noëmi (14): ‘Not yet.’
Me: ‘Do it pls.’
Noëmi: ‘A little more tolerance, mama. Parents need to accept their children the way they are. Psychology, you know.’
Me: ‘This theory was apparently invented by someone the child of whom had already done his homework. Do your maths homework and I will immediately accept you the way you are. Success!’
Our son (10) has homework from school: he has to list his own major characteristic features.
He is asking us, his parents, for inspiration.
After this, we need to comfort him for 2 hours as we had said he is overly sensitive, although it’s totally not true, he isn’t!!!
My daughter (14): ‘My favourite movie genre is horror!’
Me: ‘But why? Who on earth likes to be terrified?’
She: ‘Me, for example.’
Me: ‘Well, how come then that yesterday when we found that ugly big spider in the living room, you claimed we should move to another house immediately? You did not seem to be enjoying horror.’
She: ‘It’s simple. The genre of the Ugly Big Spider is not horror. It’s Nat Geo.’
This is going to be a highly upset post about the card game ‘Dirty Pig’, which my son, Walter (10 ys), saw in his best friend’s home, and so we also needed to buy for home.
In a nutshell, you win the game if you can the sooner achieve the following:- make all 4 of your pigs dirty- build them a house each- supply the houses with doors that can be closed – in order to prevent the neighbour farmer (game opponent, for the ease let’s call her ‘mama’) enter the house with a big hose making your pigs clean.
And here is The Thing.
I am sitting with my sparkling clean piglets team nicely satisfied, all have houses with all fullextra appliances, still my son wins unexpectedly, what could go wrong??
‘Sparking clean’.I have cleaned my son’s piglets as much as I could, but in the meanwhile forgot to make my own friends muddy.
And that’s totally unfair!
The fact that I, as parent, being duly conditioned for many years of parenthood for making things ‘corrected’, ‘back in order’, ‘CLEAN’ suddenly need to make things DIRTY, which is UNclean, UNorderly, UNgood. … And that just proves to be fully incomprehensible for my mother mind.
Of course it’s easy for my son to win games aiming at making things dirty – this is his main profile, for God’s sake! Years of experience, in possession of all the existing know-how!
I am planning to make a petition towards the EU as never ever have I encountered such severe discrimination in the game industry.
Equal rights for parents!
My daughter (14) (in philosophical tone):
‘People change so much over time.. I remember 1-2 years ago, when I was still a child, I used to talk back to you..’
Me: ‘Only for my good understanding: so if talking back was what you did in the past, what do you call the thing you do nowadays since you are a teenager..?’
She: ‘I do not talk back any more.
From time to time I might express a different view, though..’
Me to my son: ‘Walter, would you like some more tea?
……Walter, it’s such a pity you don’t pay attention to what I am saying, you are just always playing with that monster game..”
Walter (10) (playing with the monster game):
‘No, it’s not at all true, it wasn’t me who went into the living room with dirty shoes!!!!’
My husband (upset to our son for something):
‘Walter, I cannot believe it, I have told you 1000 times not to do that!! You’re just like mom!!’
Me: ‘??Pardon, what have I done this time?’
My husband (excusing himself in a peacemaker tone):
‘Oh, sorry, you haven’t done anything wrong, of course.
I just wanted to tell him something insulting.’
We teach our children not to run immediately opening the door whenever somebody rings the bell, but always ask first who is standing at the door.
At one occasion:
Our son (10): ‘Who is it?’
My husband: ‘Papa.’
Son: ‘Papa who?’
Rules are rules.